Growing Around Episodes: Movie Mayhem (Draft 2)
It's a Saturday morning. The Dunn family is eating their breakfast while watching teleivsion in the living room. Right now they're watching a news program. Timmy specifically is eating cereal. Child News Anchor: And the kid took a toy from there store... without paying! audience goes "ooh" as in "ooh, he's in trouble" Sally: folded in disgust Ugh, there's nothing some kids won't do nowadays! News Anchor: When we get back, some really cute kittens. Sally: Omigosh! Omigosh! I can't wait. Commercial: Now from the makers of Doll Story. The movie you've all been waiting for. Narrator: In a world... where ninjas roam cuts to show ninjas running like crazy making weird noises Narrator: In a world where tanks are really, really cool shows a tank rotating wildly and cuts inside to two kids fighting over the control pans on the narrator in person, reading off the script Narrator: In a world where narrators explode... wait, what? explosion happens beneath him and sends him flying backward with a willhelm scream. A kid dressed like a heavy duty commando appears with the detonator Commando Kid: The one and only Captain Commando, with enough explosions to make Michelle Day blush. Oh yeah... we're that hardcore. pans to Robert, staring in awe. Robert: Wow, that was my favorite series as a kid. I can't believe that they're making a new one. Hey Sally, can I see it? shows the narrator all sooty and smoking Narrator: In theaters now, rated KO—Kids only. cuts back to Robert Robert: Man, that whomps. Sally: Hey, Robbie! Language. Robert: Sorry, it's just that I was a kid once. I've seen things just like it before! I mean, why can't I see it? Timmy: muffled Sally: Um... Timmy, that's not milk. That's paste. Timmy: Swallows Oh, no wonder it tastes so weird. Our paste went bad days ago. Anyway, what I was saying is that movies are rated KO because they have complex themes that grown-ups can no longer understand. Robert: Sorry if I don't believe you. Timmy: Well sorry, but that's the way it is. Why don't you watch something for grown-ups? Robert: Because all of it's junk. No one really cares about our movies, thinking that they're "just for grown-ups." Timmy: I heard Linda talking about a movie awhile ago. Robert: That's included in the junk. Linda: Hey! Well, there is one I'm looking forward to going to, Kissing in Caralot. I'm pretty sure it'll change Robert's mind on my movies being "junk." Robert: Wait a minute, if I'm not going to see Captain Commando, then there's no reason to go. Sally: Oh come on, try and have a little more fun than that. I mean, what were you planning on doing instead? Robert: I dunno. Maybe finish my studying— Sally: Robert by the collar and pulls him away Yup, that settles it, you're going to the movies with Linda. It's Saturday dude, have some fun! with Sally in the car driving. She is steering the wheel crazily. Her hair flies to the right for a few seconds. We hear a crunching noise. Then Sally's hair flies to the left for a few seconds. We hear a thump and the camera pans to a kid on top of the hood of the car, hanging on for dear life Random Kid: Hey crazy girl, where'd you learn to drive! Sally: turning the wheel Get. Off. My. CAR! Linda: looking outside, implied to be the kid You know, that's actually a good question that I don't think you've ever answered. Where did you learn how to drive? Sally: her head, but is still driving Learn? You don't learn how to drive. It's like walking or talking. One day, you just know how. Linda: Well, can you slow down a little? I'm getting queasy. go over a huge bump, causing the adults to hit their heads Sally: back to the road Silly grown-ups. The point of driving is to get where you're going as fast as possible. slams on the breaks, causing the adults to fly forward but be stopped by their seatbelts. Sally: See, we're already at the movies. at her watch And I beat Timmy's record time. Awesome! You guys have fun. I'm gonna see if I can do better on the way back. Linda: at Robert Remind me to thank whoever invented seatbelts. The two of them are walking up to the movie theater. Robert stares at the Captain Commando poster Linda: You're not still planning on seeing that movie, right? Robert: Well, I'm not watching Kissing in Canada. Linda: I'm sure that Sally and Timmy will let you see it when it comes out on video. Robert: Uh-huh. Linda: You're gonna go into that movie anyway, aren't you? Robert: Yup. Linda: What do you think Timmy and Sally will do to you when they find out. Robert: They're not gonna find out. At the ticket counter. There are various other people around, some kids on their own, some adults with kids. Robert and Linda are the only adults on their own Robert: One for Kissing in Kansas and one for mumbling Captain Commando Ticket Taker: around Robert Uh-huh, and where are your kids, mister? Robert: I... um... don't have any? Ticket Giver: Uh-huh. That movie ain't for grown-ups tone meaning that you can't see it. Robert: Well, I'm watching that or nothing. Ticket Giver: Happily Alright, cya! Robert: Wait, what? Linda: Yes, I'd like a ticket to Kissing in Caralot. Robert: What about me? Linda: You said you didn't want to see it. And great plan too, walking up to the front door and asking to be let in. Robert: Okay, maybe I could of thought this through better, but— Ticket Giver: Whiney Come on guys! I gotta job to do! Hurry up Linda: Alright then, two for Kissing in Caralot. and Linda are now at the snack bar, waiting in line. It's a crowded day at the theater Kid in front of them 1: And did you see when Captain Commando— Kid in front of them 2: Yeah, it was all like Boom Boom Ka-pow! sweats as their conversation goes on Robert: Excuse me, I've got to use the restroom. Linda: Well hurry up. The movie starts in five minutes. ducks behind the bathroom door and starts looking outside of it, scanning the environment for the right way into the theater. He sees the entrance to various other theaters like the one for SmellRaiser, the one for The Umpire Strikes Back, one for Clueless in Seatle, but finally the camera pans on the Captain Commando theater tries to sneak towards the theater. He crawls under a bench with extreme determination. He does a cartwheel under someone's legs. He sidles along a wall being extremely careful not to be seen. He appears in the popcorn machine when a kid opens it up. He hands the kid a bag of popcorn and the kid nonchalantly takes it. Robert looks both ways and disappears back into the machine. All the while a Mission Impossible homage is playing. is looking determined in the distance, when— Ticket Taker: Tickets please. pans on him Linda: Ah yes, right here the kid two tickets looks at Robert Linda: Um Robbie, what are you doing? Robert: I... um... Ticket Taker: I think he was playing spy. I love seeing grown-ups try more stuff like that! to Linda But to tell you the truth, he ain't that good at it. It took him like forever to get from the bathroom to here. Taker looks at the tickets and laughs Ticket Taker: Oh, I see why you were trying to sneak away! gives a snarky face, and then he thinks for a moment Robert: Well, since you like grown-ups try more kids' stuff, I do want to see the Captain Commando movie. Ticket Taker: Nah, I think you should have fun with your lovey dovey movie. to himself starts pulling Robert down the hall to the theater Linda: Look, you just can't see that Captain Commando movie. Why don't you just come see my movie and enjoy it? Robert: It sounds so stupid! looks at him shocked Linda: Wow, Sally was right, you've really got to watch your language. Robert: his hand on the theater door to Captain Commando Whatever. Linda: Please Robert don't. Aren't you worried what Sally will do to you when she finds out? Robert: at Linda Well, she isn't going to find out, now is she? Linda: No, but I just thought that you were... never mind defeated... just enjoy your movie, Robert. walks in the theater and the camera pans on a theater employee standing in the hallway. He looks at Robert angrily and then the camera pans back to Linda. A loud sound gets her to stare at the door. Suddenly there are many weird and random sounds, from what could be punches and kicks to animal sounds. Eventually Robert gets kicked out of the room with a blackened eye. Robert: I will not give up! Linda: Um... yeah, you have fun with that. I'm going to go watch my movie. have a montage of Robert trying to break into the theater. This next segment is done with next to no dialog, just over dramatic music. He starts by following a couple of kids while wearing a fake mustache. The theater guard doesn't notice that it's Robert until he does a double take. Robert tries sneaking through the vents. He takes a few turns before he finds a place that he's supposed to drop down. He looks at a map of the vents and confirms his suspicion.He drops down and lands on the theater guard. He looks at the map again, face-palms, and turns it upside down. We finally cut to Robert trying to enter through the back door and trying to cut the wires on it. He frantically tries to figure out whether it's supposed to be the blue wire or the green wire. The tension builds up. cuts to Linda who is in the middle of watching the movie. A random explosion is heard from the background. Linda: Wonder what that was.... probably nothing. back to Robert who is face to face with the theater guard. He gives an awkward expression before we cut to him being tossed out of the theater once again. Robert is inside a trash can and is moving it towards the theater. He gets closer and closer to it, and is getting more and more excited. The door bursts open and some kid walks outside. He tosses his soda and popcorn in the Robert trash can. Robert: and covered with gunk Gah, doesn't anyone know that it's bad to waste food. shakes himself off and goes back into the theater. Every time that the guard looks at a kid entering or leaving the theater, Robert moves a little bit forward. This scene should not go on too long, but should keep the intensity of the scenario. Each time a kid passes by more food is thrown at Robert. When Robert finally gets up to the theater guard, the guard puts his foot out and causes Robert to spill out of the trash can. Theater Guard: I'm not a dummy you know. Robert: If you knew that I was in that trash can, why didn't you say anything? Theater Guard: [Bending to his knees and giving a happy smile You looked like you were having fun! Robert: Alright, fine, toss me out again. Theater Guard: Nah, I'm not going to do that. I'm bringing you down to the manager. begins dragging Robert out of the theater. We cut to see the ticket taker from before Ticket Taker: See dude, I told you that you suck at playing spy. the manager's office. Robert is sitting on a chair nervously while the manager stares him down. Robert: So... what are you going to do to me? Manager: Hmm... I think I'm gonna have to call your kids on this one. Wonder how they're gonna punish you. enter Robert's thoughts. Robert is forced into one of Sally's tea parties, with Robert completely dressed for the part. Sally: Robert And would you like some crumpets, Mrs. Nesbitt? to reality Robert: desperately Please... don't! Manager: Thinking I don't know. Robert: Please, I'll do anything. Manager: Alright. Stand up. stands up Manager: Put your left foot forward. puts his left foot forward Manager: Take your left foot out. takes it back Manager: Put your left foot forward. puts his left foot forward Manager: Now shake it all about— a knock on the door. It opens and Linda's there. Linda: Oh Robert! There you are! Manager: You know this man? Linda: He's my husband. Manager: Ah. Well, you should know that he's in a lot of trouble for trying to sneak into a Kids' Only movie Linda: Robert, I told you that it would be a bad idea to sneak into that movie! Robert: Well, I'm not going to see your stupid Chick Flick. Manager: Why didn't you want to watch Chickens 3? I loved that movie! Robert: No, it's a figure of—never mind. Look, I'm not going to see Kissing in Kansas, or whatever it was called. Linda: Come on Robert, it's a great movie! Manager: Oh, you mean Kissing in Caralot? This gives me a brilliant idea. looks both ways awkwardly Manager: I'll forget this little incident, and I won't call your kids, if you go see that lovey dovey movie! Robert: Um... can I take a third option? to Robert in the theater, next to Linda Linda: Oh come on Robbie, you're going to love it! Robert: Yeah, I doubt it. Linda: Shh, the movie's starting. see a parody of the MGM Lion with a kitten meowing instead of a full-grown lion. Then as the movie begins we cut back to Robert. At first he seems bored and annoyed, but then he gets a few chuckles, and then he reacts vigorously to the movie—roaring with laughter, gazing with awe, and finally crying as the movie ends Linda: folded victoriously So, what did you think? Robert: Let's watch it again! Section heading Write the second section of your page here.